The Cruel Joke

It seems as though it were yesterday that I was a god. Now, only a pathetic man. Fifteen years old, 6'2", 135 lbs, bench press 300 lbs, no fear, no pain, no emotion, no regret, no worries, nothing to lose and didn't care if I lost. Affected by nothing, untouchable, strong, A GOD. Now, twenty-five years old, overweight, balding, tired, high blood preasure, no lung capacity, no life, unfortunately, no death, I work, i have nothing to show for it, I want, and don't receive, have nothing, am nothing, I'm just like you. Funny huh? This is life. This is the joke. We are the punchline. Fuck life. Fuck god. Fuck it all. If this is all there is, then why are we here? Who are we amusing? If I had my way I'd set fire to it all. See who'd be laughing then. Personally I don't think this shits funny anymore. I'm offended. Someone had better make it right soon or.....well I guess nothing. What's to do? Fuck it. Fuck it all!

All is Lost

There is nothing left in the world for me to do that hasn't been done already. At least nothing legal. So what now? Kids.....got 'em. Good job......got it. Wife? Had one, got rid of her, and got a new one all is good. So what? I'll figure it out I'm sure. It just amazes me that people can live to be 90 and not kill themselves from boredom. What is there left? Nothing. In any event I'll figure somehting out I'm sure. It'll get better......right?

Yeah this is it welcome to hell.

Wrap your mind around this one.

Wrap your mind around this one if you can. People who have near death experiences claim to see a light at the end of a tunnel, at least a lot of them do. To me, this sounds like childbirth. Think about it, what if this is the afterlife......what if this IS Hell. Possibly the life you lived before determines the quality of the next life. So causing a viscious cycle of suck. Let's say Bill Gates, for instance, he's got more money than god, probably has everything he ever wanted, right? He was a missionary or some shit, earning himself a better life the next go around, and he didn't do to bad for himself. Now myself, on the other hand, I must have been a rapist or serial killer because my "quality of life" is an oxymoron in itself. There is no quality, just quantity. There is just to much of a bad thing. "So if you don't like life quit crying and do something about it" right? Fuck You. There's nothing to do about it. Change. Change is only available to those who can afford it. Or those who have time to accomplish it. There is no change only tolerance. Tolerance of the things I hate the most. Those things that make me miserable. Tolerance of you. That's right I said you. "So what did I ever do to you?" You're here aren't you? One of the biggest problems with the world today is we live here. We are a virus that consumes and destroys everything we come in contact with not unlike Cancer. So if we are parasites what does that make god? God? There is no god. If I had to worship a god, I'd worship Ira Boots the CEO of the company I work for. He is god. His decisions and actions directly affect and influence my life. Or how about George W. Bush? Isn't he god. He seems like he should be. He's doing as good a job as the other did. Or, my favorite, the almighty dollar. There is a god. I bow down and worship every time I light a cigarette, or eat a hot pocket. Absolutely nothing in life can be achieved without money, so to hell with evrything else,oh wait we're already in hell so Fuck it. Have a nice day.